Tokyo, baby!

If you follow me on the Twitter.com, you’ll have seen that I was in Tokyo earlier this month. And if you don’t follow me, then let it be known that I was in Tokyo earlier this month and it’s now become one of my favourite cities. Much as I love the countryside, big fields and wide open skies, my heart belongs to skyscrapers and metropolitan hustle bustle, which are things which Tokyo has in spades.

We stayed in Shibuya which meant I got to walk across (and occasionally lose my husband in) the world famous crossing every day while we were there. We also explored the neon wonderland which is Shinjuku, saw someone driving around Harijuku in a soft top blasting out ‘Since Yesterday’ by Strawberry Switchblade and ate extremely fancy chiffon cake in Ginza while listening to yacht rock.  And that’s before I go into detail about all the incredible food we ate, highballs we drank, skincare we* (*I) bought and karaoke classics we murdered. It truly is the most incredible, awe inspiring city and I’m already plotting ways to return there one day soon.

Its residents also happen to be exceptionally stylish. So it would have just been rude if I didn’t bring my clothing A-game to the city too.

LEATHER JACKET: River Island Plus (size up if you have big boobs!)

SHIRT DRESS: Universal Standard

TIGHTS: Heist

SHOES: Kin by John Lewis

NECKLACE: Tatty Devine

I love it when a good outfit comes together and this shirt dress from Universal Standard provides the perfect, casual canvas to build a look around. It may not look like much, but take my word for it, it is gorgeous. Everything from the colour to the tulip shape to the person who designed it is extremely my jam. I’m wearing a Medium (US size 18 – 20/UK size 20 – 22) here and it fit perfectly with just enough stretch to cover my boobs with minimal gaping. Universal Standard are an American plus size brand who I absolutely adore and who I would order much much more from if my order hadn’t been hammered by customs charges (I had to pay an eye watering £30 to get my package, so if you do buy anything from them, I’d suggest seducing someone who works for the Post Office.)

I have – as much as it pains me to admit – also become a fully paid up member of the Heist tights club. Let it be known, these bad boys are not cheap. (I actually cried when I laddered my first pair during a drunken night on the town). However, they are the first tights I’ve worn in a long time which a) don’t fall down over my fat ass and hips and which b) I can run for a bus in. If you’re a fellow chub who’s fed up of wearing cycling shorts over their ill fitting M&S 80 denier specials, I can’t recommend these enough. Just make sure you’re super careful when you’re whipping them down to take a whizz.

If you thought I wasn’t going to conclude this post with a selfie, then you would be badly mistaken my friends. This picture combines three of my current loves – Charlotte Tilbury’s gorgeous ‘Secret Salma’ lipstick from her ‘Hot Lips’ collection (which – trust me on this one – goes with everything), my new favourite Tatty Devine planet necklace and a fantastic grumpy cloud badge which I received from 3 of Cups Press as part of their ‘On Anxiety’ anthology. As an aside, an essay of mine all about my boobs will be featured in their next book, ‘On Bodies’, which is currently raising money via Kickstarter. So, if you like my writing (and my tits), you should definitely hop over there and pledge some sweet sweet cash towards it.

34

I turned 34 last Tuesday. 34 doesn’t feel like a real age. It sounds far too grown up, the kind of age that ‘real’ adults are, rather than overgrown teenagers like myself. In my head, I’m still a scruffy 21 year old who mooches around in ill fitting clothes while attempting to make a living by writing overwrought features about post-rock bands rather than a middle aged woman who wears slightly better fitting clothes while trying to make a living by (terrifyingly) starting up her own business. It’s a lot.

Of course, being a proper grown up, I ameliorated these fears in a rational and adult manner. By which, I mean I went for a very fancy lunch, hung out with some cats, went to a gig in a cathedral and had a McDonalds on the way home. I couldn’t have asked for a better birthday.

COAT: Marks & Spencer

DRESS: Alexa Chung for Marks & Spencer

SHOES: Marks & Spencer

NECKLACE: Topshop (old)

EARRINGS: Monki (old)

HANDBAG: Kate Spade (old)

I was a bit devastated recently to hear the news that the clothing arm of Marks & Spencer is experiencing some difficulties. As you may have gathered, I absolutely adore Marks & Spencer. Their underwear is comfy, their jeans fit my weird hips and butt area like they were moulded around them and I know their stuff won’t fall apart after a few wears (unlike some brands I’ve encountered recently – River Island, I’m looking at you here.)

Their recent Alexa Chung collection, where she revisited designs from their archives, has been a bit of an eye opener to my chubby self. Seeing as they stopped at size 18, I fully expected not to fit into any of her items. Hence why I was pleasantly surprised to discover that I could easily fit into this size 16 shirt dress (which, according to a Twitter friend of mine, makes me look like a ’80s space dominatrix’) with room to spare. While I’m well aware that I’m being pandered to via some serious vanity sizing, I’ve never been pandered to so effectively. The only parts in which it falls down is that it creases remarkably easily and its silky fabric makes it a bugger to wear when you’re drunk as you’ll end up sliding off pub stools and onto the floor while mid conversation. You can probably all guess how I discovered this.

I realise that this outfit doesn’t resemble the ones above, but I feel it would be a dereliction of beauty blogger duty not to mention L’Oreal’s Colour Riche lipstick in Blake Red. It’s the most perfect, carmine red I’ve ever found and knocks socks off pretty much everything else I’ve ever tried (and yes, that does include MAC’s Russian Red, a lipstick so matte it feels like you’re trying to drag a crayon across your lips.) It’s beautifully creamy, costs a mere £6.99 and stayed on throughout a challenging 2 hour tattoo session last Saturday. Frankly, it’s one of those bargain high street beauty buys that thrifty types like myself live for. Apparently, L’Oreal are discontinuing it, so I’d recommend buying it in bulk now, if only to provide a pop of colour in these increasingly grey times.

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Face Off

Yes, it’s another outfit post featuring an item from Monki. But if you follow the same people as me on Twitter, you’ll know that we’ve all been losing our shit over this amazing Jonna dress of theirs. It’s an outrageously comfy polo neck dress which features a print of some amazing babes which work there. Wearing it makes me feel like I’m wearing a hug.

DRESS: Monki

SHOES: Dr Martens

BELT: ASOS Curve (old)

EARRINGS: Topshop

Because I am prone to overthinking things – particularly when it comes to clothing – I almost didn’t buy this when I first tried it on. I thought it made me look like I was wearing a bin bag. However, once I’d added a belt (and listened to some words of wisdom from my excellent friends) I knew it had to be mine. And I’m so glad it is. It’s a dress which makes me feel happy every time I put it on.

Unfortunately, it’s limited edition which means that it’s currently only available in XS on their website. However, if you keep asking Monki nicely, they may make some more! I’d also recommend keeping an eye on ASOS and Ebay as they occasionally crop up there. But even if you don’t manage to get your hands on this version, Monki’s polo neck dresses are definitely a great investment. I like wearing mine to the office and get great compliments every time I do.

I’d also like to give a shout out to Topshop’s excellent (and underrated) line of make-up. Their Fast Lane shade of lipstick has rapidly become one of my favourites. It also lasts ages, standing up to the numerous cups of coffee and slices of toast I consume during the average working day. I’m also totally in love with their Chameleon highlighter. A quick dash of it across my cheeks makes me look like I’m glowing from the inside which is quite an achievement when you think of how grim the weather has been in the North West of England recently.

 

Look what you could have worn: The Guardian’s gold edit

Oh the Guardian. I expected so much more from you. Granted, I am not the first person to say this. Nor will I be the last. But, as someone who has written about fat issues for them in the past, I can’t help but feel disappointed when I look through their fashion section and see nothing plus sized featured. Granted, they’re great at doing the occasional piece on fat fashion when it suits them, but I do feel annoyed when I look through their fashion section and see (practically) nothing there that I can wear. This is a fault of pretty much all traditional fashion media, but I do wish they’d realise that it’s not enough to pay lip service to fats when it suits you to do so.

However, I live in hope. And it’s the hope that kills you. So, when I saw the Guardian’s listicle of the 10 of the best gold pieces on the high street, I wanted to believe that I’d see an item of clothing which I may actually be able to wear. While they kind of met that expectation (more on that below), they could still do better.

I love gold items because I am a gaudy magpie who is attracted to anything that shimmers. If that item also happens to be covered in sequins, even better. Happily for me, there are some amazing gold plus sized items out there at the moment. Here’s five of my favourites. And, Guardian fashion editors, if you ever need someone to do a plus sized edit for you, drop me a line. (Seriously, I could use the money.)

Elvi Prima Champagne Quilted Skirt – £79.00

A quilted gold skirt? Be still my beating heart. This is such a deliciously luxury bitch item that it begs to be worn while you sip champagne and nibble on a canape. I love how Elvi have styled this on their website, and would totally wear that entire outfit to a chic Autumnal soirée. Alternatively, dazzle your colleagues on a grey Tuesday morning by sweeping in wearing it with a black roll neck, 120 denier tights and brogues.

Elena Miro Sequin Embellished Sweater – £181.90

I’ve spent a lot of time browsing navabi recently. While their items are more expensive than your average plus sized retailer, they’re all of exceptional quality. And I’d rather pay more for an item that I know will last years, rather than one which will self destruct after a few wears. Which brings us to this beauty. Speaking as someone who has problems with jumpers riding up and flashing her belly, I love the length of this, as well as the big sequinned polka dots. I could totally see myself wearing this with a leather pencil skirt.

Simply Be Sequin Top – £45.00

This is totally the top you’d wear to a Christmas party, but hey, there’s nothing wrong with that. (Better that than spending over £100 on a fancy dress outfit you’ll only wear once.) I’d pair this with wet look leggings and pointed gold heels. And maybe some tinsel.

Joanna Hope Sequin Dress – £65.00

This dress is my everything, and so much more. Everything about it is perfect, from its slinky shape to it being entirely covered in shimmering gold sequins. Yes, it would probably scratch the crap out of you, but I’d say it’s a price worth paying to wear something which makes you look like a gloriously chubby Oscar statuette.

Monki Frida Glitter Kimono – £40.00

In the interests of fairness, I should mention that this kimono was featured in the Guardian’s piece. But, seeing as many Monki items can be worn by us chubs, I couldn’t resist featuring it here too. I love how interesting this piece is, all rippling shimmers. I’d wear it with some skinny ripped jeans, a black t-shirt and some Doc Martens, but it’s so versatile that I could imagine it being styled a number of different ways. It’s definitely going on my wish list.

Will you be wearing gold this Autumn? Which piece is your favourite? Let me know in the comments!