and other stories, fashion, Joanie clothing, John Lewis, Marks and Spencer, metallics, Monki, office wear, ootd, summer, tropical, Work outfit

Treat yo’self: April Pay Day edition

Let me get real for a moment here readers. April was a gold plated turd of a month. Work was rough, my Mum broke her hip quite badly before Easter, I got stranded (ish) in London after a fire at Euston station and – to top it all off – I was treated to some chronic insomnia. It felt like I spent most of the month crying from exhaustion, stress, or both. Part of me is blaming it on Mercury in retrograde, and another part is just blaming it on a year which seems to be far too bloody keen on seeing how far it can push me before I finally snap (to which I say, ‘do your worst, bitch.’)

So, allow me to indulge in some good old fashioned capitalism in the form of payday retail therapy. Fashion brands have embraced spring big time, which means lots of pastels, pleats, flounces and frills (arguably Spring/Summer is the only season where we’ll let them off for their obsession with cold shoulders.) You don’t have to look far at the moment to find some really unique, fun, plus sized items. I’m particularly smitten with the mules shown above in that perfect shade of parma violet. They’d look fantastic when paired with a super cute nautical themed t-shirt from Joanie (just one piece in a sailor themed collection which manages to be cute without veering into the costumey) and a metallic pleated skirt from Marks and Spencer – an item which I could see myself flouncing around in on both an office floor and a dance floor. Just add this great 80s-esque Laura Slater designed leather clutch bag from Kin at John Lewis and Bob’s your drag queen.

Then there’s this kimono from Monki which appears to be the Twitter-cool-girl uniform item of choice at the moment. I’ve seen a remarkable amount of babes wearing it (and looking amazing while doing so) which means I’ll be forced to pick my own up soon – after all, I do hate to be left out of trends. And besides, just look at that print! Imagine how many selfies you could take wearing it while posing on a sandy beach next to a palm tree. Or, just in your bedroom standing next to a cheese plant if you’re on a budget.

Suede Cross Strap Mules (£65.00) – And Other Stories

Frankie French Nautical Tee (£18.00) – Joanie

Laura Slater Leather Clutch Bag (£55.20) Kin by John Lewis

Metallic Pleated A-Line Skirt (£49.50) – Marks and Spencer

Long Caftan Dress (£30.00) – Monki

 

 

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Animal print, Autumn, Beauty bloggers, coats, Jewellery, lipstick, MAC, Make Up, Make Up Revolution, Marks and Spencer, metallics, Monki, ootd, Outfit post, outfits, plus sized bloggers, plus sized blogging, plus sized fashion, psbloggers, skirts, Topshop, wiwt, Work outfit, Work wear

Luxury Witch

Recently, I attended a job interview where I found myself explaining the concept of a ‘Luxury Witch’ to a rather bemused interview panel. ‘Imagine a really well dressed Goth who takes Ubers everywhere,’ I exclaimed before informing them that crushed velvet and pleated skirts were really in this season. They’re yet to let me know if I’ve been offered the job.

Whatever happens with my employment prospects, I’m deeply happy to have introduced the concept of ‘Luxury Witch’ to a wider audience. And – if this term ever appears in the Oxford English Dictionary – you’d probably find a picture of this outfit underneath it.

luxury-witch-leopard-print-coat

COAT: Marks and Spencer

ROLL NECK: Marks and Spencer

PLEATED SKIRT: Marks and Spencer

BELT: Vintage

BOOTS: Topshop

EARRINGS: Monki

roll-neck

My love of Marks and Spencer’s clothing runs deep – I will go to my grave arguing that they make the comfiest underwear on the market – and they are really knocking it out of the park this season. Their stuff is chic, reasonably priced and doesn’t fall apart after a few rounds in the washing machine (handy when you spill as much down yourself as I do). They do great everyday basics and on trend pieces like this gloriously witchy metallic midi skirt and leopard print coat, both of which look far more luxurious than their price tags would lead you to believe. Plus, M&S remains the only shop I can pop into during my lunch hour where I can purchase moisturiser, a skirt and a sandwich at the same time. What a time to be alive.

luxury-witch

In the spirit of Halloween, I opted to experiment with my eye make-up and try out a more dramatic look. I used Make Up Revolution’s ‘Fortune Favours The Brave’ palette (an absolute bargain at £9.99) to recreate this gorgeous rose gold smokey eye look. I’m a bit of a novice when it comes to eyeshadow, but this is such a lovely (and easy!) tutorial to follow. While it’s not quite as elegant as Nancy’s,  I’m super pleased about how well it turned out.

I completed the look with MAC’s ‘Roxo‘, a limited edition blood red lipstick. While this particular shade is sold out on their website, I’m fairly sure that you could find lots of lovely dupes without searching too hard.

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ASOS Curve, dresses, lipstick, Monki, office wear, ootd, Outfit post, outfits, Plus sized, plus sized bloggers, plus sized blogging, plus sized fashion, psbloggers, Topshop, Work outfit

Face Off

Yes, it’s another outfit post featuring an item from Monki. But if you follow the same people as me on Twitter, you’ll know that we’ve all been losing our shit over this amazing Jonna dress of theirs. It’s an outrageously comfy polo neck dress which features a print of some amazing babes which work there. Wearing it makes me feel like I’m wearing a hug.

Full length 1

DRESS: Monki

SHOES: Dr Martens

BELT: ASOS Curve (old)

EARRINGS: Topshop

Full length 2

Because I am prone to overthinking things – particularly when it comes to clothing – I almost didn’t buy this when I first tried it on. I thought it made me look like I was wearing a bin bag. However, once I’d added a belt (and listened to some words of wisdom from my excellent friends) I knew it had to be mine. And I’m so glad it is. It’s a dress which makes me feel happy every time I put it on.

Unfortunately, it’s limited edition which means that it’s currently only available in XS on their website. However, if you keep asking Monki nicely, they may make some more! I’d also recommend keeping an eye on ASOS and Ebay as they occasionally crop up there. But even if you don’t manage to get your hands on this version, Monki’s polo neck dresses are definitely a great investment. I like wearing mine to the office and get great compliments every time I do.

Topshop lipstick

I’d also like to give a shout out to Topshop’s excellent (and underrated) line of make-up. Their Fast Lane shade of lipstick has rapidly become one of my favourites. It also lasts ages, standing up to the numerous cups of coffee and slices of toast I consume during the average working day. I’m also totally in love with their Chameleon highlighter. A quick dash of it across my cheeks makes me look like I’m glowing from the inside which is quite an achievement when you think of how grim the weather has been in the North West of England recently.

 

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The return of the Fat White Duke

I don’t wish to speak too rashly, but I believe that this Pink Clove jumpsuit may be the perfect jumpsuit. It’s chic, comfy and can be worn to every event going (important work meetings, walking through the snow while listening to David Bowie or just dates where you just sit around with your mates eating massive grilled cheese sandwiches.) Best of all, it doesn’t have a zipper meaning you don’t have to dislocate your shoulder trying to unzip the bloody thing when you need a wee. Trust me, when you have a tiny bladder and like to stay hydrated, these things are important.

Work pyjamas

JUMPSUIT: Pink Clove

BELT: Little Mistress (taken from this jumpsuit)

SHOES: ASOS (out of stock, but these are similar)

EARRINGS: Black Heart Creatives

LIPSTICK: MAC Dita Von Teese Red

Oh look it's my kitchen

I’ve seen a similar ASOS Curve version of this on Bethany and Charlotte, and admired how they’d dressed it up to suit their own unique styles. My current favourite way to wear this is with a big belt, big earrings and some silver brogues. However, I also think it would be equally as good with a statement necklace and a pair of heels. Its simplicity makes it incredibly versatile.

The best part about it though is the fit. It’s true to size with just enough stretch, meaning you can slip in and out of it in a trice. I’m 5ft 7 and the pant leg fits perfectly. The crotch doesn’t sag and it makes my arse look amazing. A friend recently described it as looking like a cross between a tuxedo and ‘work pyjamas,’ which is pretty accurate.

BHC earrings

I commissioned Black Heart Creatives to make me some (very silly and ostentatious) palm tree earrings last year which go perfectly with this outfit. They make me feel like Bootle’s answer to Pat Butcher which – in my opinion – is a strong look for 2016.

 

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Monki Business

I’ve been meaning to blog this dress from Monki for over three months now. But somehow, the time’s never been right. Every picture I took of myself wearing it made me look old, tired or lumpy. (Sometimes all three.) But if there’s one thing I’ve learned in 2015, it’s that there’s no such thing as a perfect outfit photo. Sometimes, you’ve just got to run into the talking toilets at Liverpool South Parkway station* and snap some hasty outfit selfies.

Monki Business

DRESS: Monki

BELT: ASOS Curve (old)

SHOES: Dr Martens

Monki has been one of my best finds of 2015. I love their whole ‘tomboy femme’ aesthetic (and they fact that they’re not afraid of a bit of sparkle.) They’re also a high street(ish) brand which is very forgiving to us chubs, with dresses and skirts which contain a lot of fit, flare and stretch. There’s something really refreshing about being able to fit my size 20 arse into a piece of clothing which is classed as a ‘medium.’ If you’re still unsure, plus sized queen Danielle Vanier wrote a great piece for The Debrief earlier this year about why Monki should be a plus sized girl’s best friend. 

Monki Business 2

The only area Monki fall down in is their shipping costs which is an eyewatering £6. (I presume this is because, like most H&M owned brands, it’s shipped from outside the UK.) However, a lot of their stuff can be found on ASOS who provide free delivery (and free next day delivery if you’re a Premier member.) While they don’t have the full range on there yet, it’s always worth taking a look there so you can save a few pennies.

Monki Business 3

The weather in Manchester is decidedly grey today, so I decided to pep it up a bit with this Sleek lipstick in Mystic. It’s an utterly delicious shade of fuschia and just matte enough to have staying power without drying your face out. Just the thing for a bit of festive razzle dazzle.

*I feel like I should give the toilets of Liverpool South Parkway a Christmas present for services to this blog.

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Primary Colours

Wet look leggings are my jam. A friend introduced me to them last year, and since then, I’ve worn them whenever I want to feel like a chubby version of Sandy from Grease. The best ones I’ve bought have been from ASOS (where else?) They cling in all the right places and make my butt look amazing – a rather nice added bonus. My favourite way to wear them is with a crisp white shirt and a statement necklace, helping to give me a modicum of professionalism with a dash of pizzazz. I broke these new ones out last week on a brief trip to Manchester to take my Mum to Hawksmoor Manchester (which – btw -is absolutely fantastic), see Dutch Uncles and drink lots of wine.

Primary colours

White t-shirt

Don’t you just love how gleeful I look in this picture?

WHITE SHIRT: ASOS Curve

WHITE T-SHIRT: ASOS Curve

LEGGINGS: ASOS Curve

HEELS: Next 

NECKLACE: Oliver Bonas

EARRINGS: Topshop

Business bitch

The lipstick is Nars Velvet Matte lip pencils in Dragon Girl, one of my best lippy purchases of 2014. It’s just the most perfect shade of raspberry and goes with practically everything. It’s the perfect shade for Spring, and to celebrate lighter nights and beer gardens.

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